fresh

So, it has been a long time since my last post - I'm here to fix that.

Since my last entry I have:
-gotten over someone
-stopped working on sundays
-found a new intrest
-gotten two new journals
-found a polaroid camera
-taken lots of polaroids
-settled some priorities
-enjoyed the crap out of my life

For the first on the list:
I was involved in a horribly unhealthy "relationship" that had lasted an absurd amount of time. There had been a couple of months with almost zero contact and God said, "Hey, I miss you. I think you're neat. Come talk to me. Oh, and by the way, you are absolutely done with this idiot boy." I said, "Thanks for the heads up. No problem. I think you're neat too."

Done? Wow.

Enter the facebook message (oh yes, facebook). I basically said I was finished and I didn't think we had to never talk or anything like that, but that we'd never be what we were. ever. again. never. (etc) and I told him that I had learned to protect my heart and that he would have to earn the right back to see me. It took a lot for me to write that to him. The boy that I always made allowances for, the one I thought really loved me, really would fight for me, and wanted to be with me. Somehow I had believed all of those things. So when I wrote that my hands were shaking and I had to ask God if this was really thing right thing to say. He said, "Why, yes it is". Okay God, whatever You say.
So, after everything that I had believed about this relationship, after everything I had put into it, after all the tears, broken hearts, and b.s. along the way this is what he said back to me:
"I love you more than you know (obviously), but I'm not going to try and earn a chance to see you. That's bullshit".

Really? Awesome.

That right there was the defining moment our relationship. Contradiction in terms. I love you but I'm not willing to fight for you.

Cool. That works.

So girls: stay away from crap like that. That is the moral of the story.

I'm doing quite well. I've started talking to another guy who I've known since college (that feels weird to say, oh wait, I'm not in college anymore. right.), he's nice and he likes the woods and he knows how to cook. Woohoo! So we'll see. Moving very very slow. That works just fine for me.

Also, I told my boss that I was no longer going to work on Sundays. As God told me that I was done with the idiot boy, He also said, "Oh, I forgot, you're no longer going to work on Sundays. You're going to spend that time with Me."

Sure thing God.

I'm going to be going to The Vine basically every Sunday. I'm pretty thrilled about that. Fellowship! Yes!

Norah Jones is extremely fun to listen to when you're cooking. Somehow when it's ready it tastes better. This is true of speghetti at least. Ha! It's quite nice to listen to some really great mellow music and cook at the same time. On a pink Zune of course.

Oh yes, my Zune is pink.